FIGHT OF THE LUBRICATING GEL (NC 16 - sexual diaglogues)
This is fucking ridiculous please. -just kill me!-
My mom called and asked: " Aye Ben, yesterday your father said that u have gel on ur table "
I recalled and search frantically and replied: "Where got?"
She continued: "Why u buy that kind of gel?"
I snapped: "What gel la? hair gel i got use what cannot?!"
Then she asked again in a serious tone: "U noe what is it use for not?"
"For hair la! duh!" i replied wif that diaoZ look
"NO! i am talking bout the lubricating gel on your table.. Your dad and i have been thinkin alot yesterday.. u noe what is it used for not? its for sexual intercourse where u..." She explained intently as if she is the sex goddess (peng).
"STOP!" i immediately interrupted. "I DID NOT HAVE SEX RECENTLY ALRIGHT!" PEngZzz
I was shocked. Like come on.. i bought that lubricating gel for fun alright, i did not have sex with anyone. Plus it has flavour and cute ma.. and for heaven gracious sake.. why would i need lubricating gel for sex when i have sophisticated skills of foreplay.. Like whatever.. lol.. jk
"U dont cause worries alright. If a gal gets pregnant how?"
"I didnt la!" i retorted
"U did right? did u use properly?" She was actually amused! Like watever
"NEVER LA!" I was pissed wif laughter... haha
"Dont tell me u use it to play with other guys?"
U noe what? at this point. I am speechless. Is she my mum? Like come on.. my mother actually thinks i have sex with another guy too!! o no.. Fine.. And she was trying hard to explain to me all the what ifs. I am sure i noe more positions and precautions then her! lol
Like come on! I noe what i am doing please. Then i asked her: " pls lo got see any condoms at my table meh? and thats so rude of u all to search my table!" I rebuked... (in actual fact i do have a condom in my drawer lol but thats not the point)
Totally ridiculous. And thanks to this lubricating gel, my mum thinks i am gay and likes to fuck gals.. LOL.. Fine... Ironic pls... DIAOzzz..
